You share something with genuine excitement, then notice the room go flatter or someone pull back. The energy drops out of you, and silence becomes the safest place to spend the rest of the interaction.
- talking quickly about an interest, seeing blank faces and barely speaking afterwards
- sending several enthusiastic messages, then retreating when the replies become shorter
- starting a vivid story and cutting it off with 'never mind' after someone looks away
Looks vs reality
The same Experience can look very different from the outside than it feels on the inside.
Wow, you have... a lot of feelings about that.
I was sharing from a place of joy and connection, and now I just feel exposed and judged for my intensity.
You suddenly went quiet. Did I say something wrong?
The 'too much' alarm went off. I've retreated into my shell to avoid any more social damage.
Okay, I get it, you're really into that.
That felt like a dismissal, not an acknowledgment. My attempt to connect through my passion just hit a wall.
You seem fine, just a little quiet now.
On the inside, I'm replaying the entire conversation, feeling the shame spiral kick in, and trying to figure out where I went 'wrong'.
Anyway, moving on...
The message was received loud and clear: my topic isn't welcome. The only safe option now is to be silent.
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