Just snap out of it.
My body is a runaway train, and you're telling me to just hit brakes that aren't there.
What it made you think
I am broken and this is my fault. My distress isn't real, it's just a dramatic performance that I need to stop.
The True Story
You are not failing when you can't 'snap out of it.' You are a person in a body that is asking for safety and time, not a command performance.
What is happening in your system?
This phrase signals that your internal state is not only wrong but also a social inconvenience. This adds a layer of shame and social threat on top of the existing overwhelm, often forcing you deeper into a state of freeze or shutdown.
What changes in you...
Hearing this repeatedly teaches me to hide my distress from this person. I learn not to trust them with my vulnerability, leading me to mask heavily or avoid them entirely when I'm struggling.
How can I navigate this in the moment?
A few ways to respond when this lands. Take whichever feels right, or none at all.
The Low-Battery Out
I need space right now.
The Honest Explanation
This isn't something I can control. My body is overwhelmed and I need some time for it to pass.
Drawing the Line
Please stop. Saying that is not helpful at all.
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