You're too needy.
My needs are real, even if they overwhelm others. I deserve support, not shame.
What it made you think
I am inherently flawed and undeserving of support, and my needs are a burden to others.
The True Story
You are not too much. Your needs are valid, and you deserve to have them met with kindness and respect.
What is happening in your system?
Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) is triggered, leading to intense feelings of shame and fear of abandonment. The nervous system interprets this as a threat to survival.
What changes in you...
I become more hesitant to express my needs, leading to isolation and unmet needs.
How can I navigate this in the moment?
A few ways to respond when this lands. Take whichever feels right, or none at all.
The Low-Battery Out
I'm doing my best. I need some space right now.
The Honest Explanation
My needs are real, and I'm not trying to be difficult. I'm just trying to get my needs met in the best way I know how.
Drawing the Line
I understand you're feeling overwhelmed, but I need to feel safe expressing my needs. If you can't offer that, I need to end this conversation.
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