Tenderness can attach itself to things that aren't alive. A discarded toy, an empty chair or the last item on a shelf can bring a surprisingly real ache, as though leaving it behind would be unkind.
- leaving a gathering carrying a friend's sadness as though it were your own
- feeling your chest tighten when a colleague is quietly upset across the room
- picking up the tension in a room and feeling worn out by it afterwards
- staying low for hours after hearing someone describe something painful
Looks vs reality
The same Experience can look very different from the outside than it feels on the inside.
You're getting way too emotional about a character in a book.
Their feelings just became my feelings. The story is fictional, but the pain I'm experiencing right now is 100% real.
It's just an old, broken chair on the sidewalk. Why do you care?
I feel a physical ache for its loneliness and abandonment. It feels like I'm looking at a part of myself.
You were in a great mood a minute ago. What happened?
I walked into a room with a heavy mood and my nervous system immediately tuned to that frequency. I'm just reflecting the unspoken sadness here.
Why are you crying? This has nothing to do with you.
I know it doesn't, but I've soaked up their grief and my own system is overflowing. I can't help it.
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